Fluffy The Puppy's 10 Dog Rules For  Humans

Ruff-ruff!! Hello humans! Since my last post 10 steps to world domination, I've been thinking about what's next after you all become my loyal followers. As your future world leader or like I prefer to be called Queen Fluffy, I wanted to set some dog rules for humans and lay down the law.

Every leader needs rules or else the followers will be like wandering sheep. There won't be too many changes.

Note if you are caught not following my rules, there will be consequences. You'll be taken to a special island and we'll mindwipe you and upload what's necessary for you to be more compliant. The pets and other animals will let me know if and when you step out of line.

Fluffy The Puppy's 10 Dog Rules For The Humans

1. Your work day will only be 7 hours long. Over that then you're disobeying me. No working on Sundays and special public holidays. You get one other day off in the week. That means you have a 5 day work week. I could make it less, but then nothing will get done.

2. Each day around 5 pm you will tune into the Fluffy channel where I will give you a tune-up. The mind control needs to be updated now and again.

Puppy's 10 Dog Rules For  Humans
Followers tuning into Fluffy channel
3. At least an hour a day will be spent playing with your pets. Another 30 minutes to an hour for training if your pet does not know the basic obedience commands. No excuses! Kids will have an extra subject Pets 101 in school where they will learn to train and take care of pets. It starts at a young age. I see some adults need training too.

4. The pets eat with you. If they don't, I'll know.

5. Breeding pets will be illegal. You'll need permission from me and I'll only authorise it if there's a pet shortage.

Fluffy's 10 Dog Rules For  Humans.

6. Every household is required to have at least one pet. I understand some personalities prefer one over the other. Pets in shelters will automatically be matched to a human to take care of them. My human will write the software application that matches a pet to a suitable human. Her programming skills are a bit rusty, but that's nothing a little bit of yelling at her won't fix.

The pet will be delivered to your doorstep and both of you will be escorted to Fluffy island immediately for training and bonding exercises. The excuse of "I have a busy lifestyle" will no longer be applicable because of shorter work hours. If you are allergic to pets we'll test you for allergies on different breeds. Don't worry! We'll find you a hairless pet if we must.

7. Killing or hurting a pet is illegal and you will be labelled a murderer. The three headed monster will deal with you. They are in charge of 'special clean-up'. There's a black one that looks like a hell-hound. There will be no mind-wipe for you sorry. Mr. Hell-hound is waiting for you.

8. I like a clean world. Those humans who don't have jobs will help with clean-up. Those who litter and pollute will be sent for mind-wiping and reprogramming.

9. All wars and crime will end immediately. You know the drill! Try anything and the animals will deal with you. Know when I say animals, I mean all the animals. I'm sure we can get the birds, insects and everyone in the oceans to join forces and team up. Go ahead! Be scared! Grrr...

10. I'll make sure everyone is happy. If you're not, to Fluffy island you go.

There it is! All you have to do is follow my rules and there won't be any trouble. See, I just want to make this world better. A doggie sees all the evil and wants to eliminate it. We are bringers of joy. So get on board humans!


Author: Fluffy
Job: Doing puppy stuff, part-time blogger
Future plans: World domination
Likes: Biting feet, hands, destroying everything in sight and cuddles
Dislikes: Baths, being picked up and self-cloning Needleman

Pic credit: Renza human took pics of me and edited. Mixed with Pixabay image.

P.S.  I've selected an assortment of personalised products below. When I'm Queen Fluffy you and your pet will be required to wear your pet's name on you at all times. The paw print is for identification purposes so that we know the pet is yours. They are affiliate links and we'll get a few cents per click to go towards my world domination fund. It will cost you nothing to click humans. Thank you! Ruff!

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The Thrill Of The Chase - A Dog's Perspective

Woof!! Hello you guys! I have always loved the thrill of the chase. Whether it's a ball, ropey or even Fluffy.

There's just something primal in chasing my prey. Not that Fluffy is prey, but she has interfered with my chasing time though. Grrr! Mommy Renza has still not figured out how to make us play fetch together. Help you guys!

She takes everything mommy throws to fetch off me. So instead of chasing the ball or ropey, I'm chasing Fluffy. That means I still get my chase on.

Mommy says we're playing too rough. She should just move out of the way! Last time I ran into her at lightning speed and her leg was swollen and sore for a whole week. Sorry Renza! But if you're in the way of the chase then you're bound to get hurt.

So why do dogs like chasing things so much? I hear "Fetch!", then I drop everything to go fetch. Whyyyyyy?!!

We are part wolf, so that means we're hunters. But does that really explain why we chase everything that moves or flies through the air? Yes it does!

Chasing increases our happy hormone levels and makes us feel super excited. It's like a drug.

There's an article here if you want to know more about the chasing behaviour. Don't go read it now. That's just rude. It's Buffy time now! Save it for later. Grrr!

Some dogs like the chase too much. Addicts! I was one of them I'll admit. I've limited it to inside the yard. I don't go running outside anymore.

Things that are built into our DNA like hunting, chasing, digging etc, needs an outlet. Some doggies are more prone to a certain type of behaviour.

Set up controlled environments so that they can get their fix on. Learn to understand why your dog does something first by researching the behaviour, training and focusing the behaviour into a safer option instead of just yelling at them to stop.

Knowledge is power you guys.

I used to chew on my blanket and take it out when mommy wanted to play ball with me. But when I got ropey (link to ropey's sister) I no longer chewed my blanket and took it out during playtime.

Buffy dog and rope toy

Ropey filled my chewing need during playtime that a ball couldn't and mommy throws it so I still get my chase on. See! We filled a need with a suitable replacement.

Lets hope Fluffy learns some manners soon and stop taking my toys. She's very rude you guys! Renza needs to teach her or soon I will! She won't like my teaching style. Grrr!!

Mommy fills our need for chasing by limiting us to the yard and closing the entrances so that we stay safe in one place.

I'm sure you humans can find a fix for whatever behaviour your dog is displaying that's not acceptable.

Time to go now you guys. Fluffy wants to play again. She's like my shadow and I try to run a little faster than her so that she's actually chasing me. The thrill of the chase is already strong in that one.

It's part of my lesson plan, plus a doggie wants to feel what it's like to be chased too. You know, for research purposes!

Woof!! Woof!!

Author: Buffy
Job: Guard dog, part-time blogger
Likes: Playing,eating and sleeping
Dislikes: Grooming and food thieves

Pic credit: Me (Buffy) and Ropey posing in pics. Plus Pixabay free stock images that mommy Renza edited.

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How My Dog Taught Me To Never Give Up.

Those who follow my blog should all know my sweet Buffy or Buff-buff as I like to call him. He's also my doeboe, my sweetiepie and some other names lol. Today I wanted to share the story of how he taught me to never give up.

A few years ago Buffy survived a dog attack by my neighbour's three dogs. These three were very territorial and back then he wanted to be friends with everyone. He went into their yard and they didn't like that.

I'm not going to go into detail, but it was a near fatal neck wound and he spent three weeks in the animal hospital. The longest three weeks of my life.

The reason why I'm bringing up such a painful memory, is because when I saw my Buffy fight for his life, it made me want to fight for my own.

The other day while talking to someone about reasons why people change, it came to me that what happened to my dog Buffy, was one of the defining moments that made me want to change.

There were a lot of nudges yes. Even signs telling me it's time to change. I just didn't know how or if I could. But when you witness a miracle like that, it changes you forever. It changed me. That event shoved me forward and it was impossible to look back.

He's a dog, but he's so much more. He got a second chance and so did I. He reminded me that second chances are possible.

Dogs are amazing like that. He then went on to teach me what unconditional love is. The purest form of love.

At that time I had everyone in my life questioning why I left my job and what my plans were. They didn't know how lost I felt. Buffy didn't care. He just wanted to be there for me and I wanted to be there for him. We helped each other heal.

dog quote

I was never a dog or a pet person before that happened, but this beautiful creature made me see how special they really are.

When I was at my lowest, he was there to offer his licks. I know just a moment with him makes me feel that everything will be ok. He survived and I will too.

He's been there every step of the way. Cheering me on. I do all of this for you buddy. You showed me to never give up.

I've changed so much in these last two years. It was not easy, but I had my two best friends by my side.  My human one and my furry one.

Each taught me different lessons and I'm continuing to learn from them and everyone else who crosses my path.

I could write an entire post about my human bestie, but he won't like that very much lol. I'll tell you this, he's a survivor too. A beautiful soul.

Of course there's my new fluff ball that's turning out to be a super awesome dog. Fluffy taught me patience. I never got to raise Buffy and I think or at least hope I'm doing an okay job with her so far.

She's not just cute, she's intelligent and friendly. She's also the craziest dog I've ever come across. Those stories she writes come from a true place.

This fluff ball has plans! How she moves and everything she does makes me feel like I'm in the presence of a dog wanting to be a leader and I take on her persona when I write her stories. It's the craziest thing!

Buffy is still alpha dog here and he lets her know. She sometimes refuses to listen and yells at him when she can't get her way. I get yelled at too lol. Yes she has a specific bark for yelling.

I take note of their different bark sounds. She also howls when she hears singing. Yes! She's a strange one. I'm glad she's all mine and I'm so proud of her. Of them.

Buffy helps to teach her important lessons about being a dog. I call her little Buffy sometimes, because she copies everything he does.

My dogs are my life. It's as simple as that. Most people won't get it. Yes they drive me insane sometimes, but I laugh about what they do together all day. They are also the reason why I'm here.

They play or sleep all day and don't have a care in the world. They would chase each other around the yard, then around my car! They look completely insane when they play.

Buffy makes weird noises and Fluffy goes all out trying to outrun him or jump on him. They wrestle and then they run again. Break, water, repeat! I'll shout at them to not play so rough, but then I just watch how happy they are. Pure joy. It's contagious.

Fluffy was not just my gift, but Buffy's too. He seemed lonely and I wanted him to have another bestie. A human can only provide so much entertainment but another dog made him really happy.

He's different now. He was really sad after the attack. I helped him as much as I could and he got a little better. He lost something that day. With Fluffy here, he's regaining a bit of what he lost.

Fluffy's friendly puppy nature is rubbing off on Buff. She greets everyone with a friendly body shake greeting that comes here. Buffy seems calmer and won't jump and bark at people like before. They are learning from each other and I'm learning from them.

I said in my last post "No one is coming to save you. Be your own hero". I take it back. My dog saved me. He's my hero.

Love you my sweet Buffy and Fluffy ♥

Until next time

Pic credit: Buffy and Fluffy pics Renza edited.

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Fluffy the puppy's 10 Steps To World Domination

Ruff-ruff!!! Hello humans! I'm glad to report my world domination plan is on track. Soon you will be chanting my name while bowing down. Be sure to order your comfy knee pillows now already. Scraped knees from bowing is a bad look.

Every leader needs a plan. Being cuddly and cute just won't cut it. If it did, then you humans would have had replacement knee caps by now from all the bowing. So what is holding the cats and dogs back from total world domination? I worked out a 10 step plan to see if I can succeed.

Fluffy's World Domination plan

1. Target a human, the only dog lover in the house and follow her everywhere. She will soon love me and do anything for me. Check!

2. Once the human Renza loves me, she'll share pics of me all over social media and introduce me as her new cute puppy. Check!

3. Go one step further and mind control my human to write down all my thoughts on her blog and make everyone fall in love with me. Check!

4. Help the human grow my followers...I mean our followers. Let Buffy in on my brilliant plan and convince him to join forces. Check!

Fluffy's 10 Steps To World Domination.
Loyal follower
5. Buffy, who is a fan favourite, writes about how I'll be cloned because he's now in on it. Not just a normal clone, but a cat-dog clone. That means not only dog people are reading our blog, but cat people too. Everyone wants their own Fluffy cat-dog clone. Check!

6. Me telling you all I'm going to be your leader and you're thinking I'm the cutest and smartest leader ever. "Omgawd soooo cuuute", you keep saying. Check!

7. All my followers share me all over social media. Apparently social media is where everyone lives these days. Check!

Fluffy the puppy's world domination plan.
This will happen in the future
8. I add subliminal messages in the shares that brainwash the humans. It spreads like a virus. One human sees the message and everyone they come into contact with gets infected.

9. Oops! Too late! You are all under my control now and you will do as I ask.

10. Every human, including the ones running countries get themselves a knee pillow and do some loyal bowing. From far and wide "Fluffy!" is chanted.

Fluffy the puppy's world domination plan.
Future news
There it is! The perfect plan. As you can see,  more than half of the steps have been completed already. Right now you're probably smiling, laughing or just rolling your eyes, because your happy pills are up.

Don't worry eye rollers, I will win you over soon. My human Renza and Buffy have no interest in the throne. But I'm not them! QUEEN ME PLEASE!!!


Author: Fluffy
Job: Doing puppy stuff, part-time blogger
Future plans: World domination
Likes: Biting feet, hands, destroying everything in sight and cuddles
Dislikes: Baths, being picked up and self-cloning Needleman

Pic credit: Renza human took pics of me and edited. Main image is from Pixabay edited by her.

P.S.  I've selected an assortment of knee pillows below. These are the type I will allow. I get a few cents per click and that will go towards my world domination fund. No buying required. Well unless you really really want to buy the personalised pet pillow cases or the huge cat head pillow. If not...click humans, click! Thank you! Ruff!

Don't forget to follow our blog for updates humans. Please share and plus one if you think your friends will like reading my Fluffy's 10 Steps To World Domination post.

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