How to Get a Loyal Follower - Fluffy's 5 Step Plan

How to Get a Loyal Follower -  Fluffy's 5 step Plan to Recruit Snowy.
Ruff! Ruff! Hello, my fluffy pack! So far my world domination plan is on track.

Mommy and the rest of the pack are working hard at growing our following and soon I will rule over all the sheep.

It's not easy to get a loyal follower but luckily the pack has me and my special skills.

I've noticed something weird though. Snowy does not fall for my basic 'win them over' tricks. What is there not to love about me?

I'm a good listener, I'm working hard on not being so evil and I'm fluffier than fluff. That's beside the fact that I'm cuter than cute.

I'm also super sweet but don't tell anyone. Leaders can't afford to be sweet!

What can I do to make Snowy one of my loyal followers? He listens to mommy, but when it comes to me he acts all weird. I try to play with him, I even do my special fluffy dance, but nope. Nothing!

Do you have any idea how much effort goes into the fluffy dance?!

I have to literally bow down, something a Queen should never ever do. Then shake my boot like there's no tomorrow.

Yes, there's some invasive sniffing involved and in your face staring, but that's just me trying to connect.

I thought of a few ways to recruit Snowy. Soon he will be one of my loyal sheep too!

Snowy refusing to follow me
Snowy refusing to follow me

Fluffy's 5 Step Plan to Recruit Snowy

1. Bring him some yummy treats


Technically mommy is the treat keeper, but I know where she stashes the good stuff. She limits the amount we get daily and poor Snowy has not mastered the art of 'get more than your share'.

Luckily I have! I just start chewing some furniture and here comes a yummy treat on a silver platter. Predictable human!

2. Teach him basic manipulation skills


My fluffy sheep should all know by now that I'm a master manipulator. I can basically get away with anything. I thought I could pass on some knowledge about my manipulation skills to Snowy.

Not everything! Just the basics. I can't share all my tricks. I'm sure he'll be grateful and bow down chanting my name once he sees how he can do whatever he wants.

3. Be the one he shares his darkest secrets with


I have an impressive list of skills on my doggie resume but sharing and bragging about them to Snowy might not get him to trust me. I was thinking if I share my darkest secrets with him maybe, just maybe he'll trust me enough to share his secrets too.

Fluffy and Snowy talking.
Sharing secrets
I could tell him about that one time I murdered that bee. I swallowed it and spit it out without the bee having time to react.

Or that I aim for mommy's wrist when we wrestle and 'play bite' her a little there. I know that's where the blood pumps.

I'm not trying to hurt mommy like I hurt the bee, I'm just letting her know what I'm capable of if she continues her lame attempts to manipulate me with yummy food. What?!! Too dark!

4. Mend the relationship between Buffy and Snowy


It's no secret that Buffy and Snowy are mortal enemies. Buffy thinks he wants to take his place and yells at him every day for stepping out of line. Luckily they have me.

Buffy and Fluffy talking.
Mending relationships
I just need to convince Buff that Snow is not a threat. How? Don't ask me. I'm not a miracle worker! I'll just tell Snowy it can be done and won't use the words "I promise".

5. Ignore him


After the first four steps, all I need to do is ignore him. He'll come looking for me to teach him more skills and he'll be addicted to my attention by then. Plan completed! Mission Recruit Snowy accomplished!

After that, he can join Buff and I for some much-needed renovations. Can you believe that Snowy's bed and blanket are still in one piece? What kind of dog is he? Seriously!

On our first mission together we will give his bed and blanket a proper tearing apart party. It will be magnificent!! I've been waiting a long time to rip through it with my sharp teeth.

Time to go work on step one. I see mommy left her room. I'll go get the treat stash!

Ruff! Ruff!

Author: Fluffy
Job: Doing puppy work, part-time blogger, a world leader in training.
Future plans: World domination
Likes: Biting hands, destroying everything in sight, playing, stalking, digging, cuddles and tummy rubs.
Dislikes: Baths, self-cloning Needleman and not getting my way.

Pic credit: Fluffy(me), Buffy and Snowy posing for pics Renza took and edited. Mommy made Fluffy clones gathering in the main pic.

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2 comments:

  1. Fluffy I am digging these tips. For me, building a loyal following happens 1 kind act at a time. A genuine blog comment here. A Pin there. All grows through 1 to 1, generous acts, human to human. Or canine to canine :) Pinned and Tweeted.

    Ryan

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ruff! Thanks Ryan! You spreading the word of the fluff means alot! I see you're also growing a following! As long as you know that I'm Queen. Grrr!
      Don't worry! Just for commenting and sharing you won't go to the dreaded fluffy island. This is the part where you breath a sigh of relief! :-)

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